You Know You’re a Jewish Mom When…

I grew up Jewish, and now, practicing my religion and raising a Jewish family is a way of life for me. While not every Jewish person’s life experiences are the same, most Jewish moms can relate to at least a few of the following…

You can absolutely answer the question, “Do you like matzah balls that float or sink?”

It is not a question of if your child will go to sleep-away camp, but which one.

Your mom, while overbearing, still helps you with adulting issues.

You know a jeweler, lawyer, doctor, and therapist. Quite possibly you are related to all of them.

As a child, you begged for Christmas lights on your home. Now you tell your children the same thing your parents told you, “No. We are Jewish.”

Bar Mitzvah parties as a child meant music and dance contests. As an adult, they mean an open bar.

You know that Passover causes constipation, and you cannot understand people’s fascination with over-priced huge crackers.

Wishing people a Happy New Year in September is totally normal.

Lox and cream cheese on a bagel is a food group.

When you host an event at your home, you have SO MUCH food. It is always better to have too much than not enough.

Finding appropriate clothes for your daughter for synagogue – the struggle is real

When someone dies, you bring food. Deli trays are known to cure grief. 

You understand the difference between Jewish brisket and Texas brisket. 

Chances are your family is huge, loud, and knows all your secrets.

Deciding between Jewish day school and public school is a decision with no perfect answer because you want the benefits of both.

Wishing someone an easy fast on Yom Kippur, while tradition, makes no sense. There is nothing easy about fasting, and for some reason, it is the one day a year you wake up starving.

Yiddish terms, like Chutzpah, come out of your mouth and you don’t even realize it.

While you may not eat them, chopped liver and and gefilte fish are normal foods to you.

Hanukkah means your house smells of latkes for weeks.

You don’t think twice about a mezuzah on your door until someone asks you, “What is this?”

You know what “member of the tribe” means.

Your mannerisms are a dead give away that you are Jewish.

When people find out you are Jewish and where you are living, they ask if you know their one and only friend that is also Jewish … and the answer is yes.

 Mazel Tov is a natural way to say congratulations, and you actually have to think to say “Congratulations” if the person is not Jewish.

A bris is a totally normal and not at all a bizarre experience that has new parents inviting 200+ people to witness their 8 day old son’s circumcision.

You LOVE your hometown Jewish community while simultaneously hating it, because you can never live down the stupid things you did as a child.

At some point your parents told you that marrying someone Jewish was a requirement for a wedding. Then you, or one of your siblings or cousins fell in love with a non-Jew, and the wedding did in fact happen. And it was beautiful.

Waking up for Sunday school as a child was horrible, and now you make your child attend.

If you have a brother or son, chances are you know every Jewish athlete.

You have a Hebrew name.

Your superstitions are strong, especially about pregnancies.

You know what Chai means, and why you write checks for weddings and Bar Mitzvahs in increments of $18.

And more than anything … you love being Jewish and all that comes with it!


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