What I’m NOT Doing This Summer (The ANTI Bucket List)

I love summer with my kids. Every year, we make a list of things we want to do over their break from school- trips to the water park, baseball games, or a trek down to Galveston or Surfside Beach.

If that’s the summer “bucket list”, I’ve got a list of my own to add. But it’s the ANTI bucket list. The stuff I’m absolutely not doing this summer- for better or worse. Here goes.

I’m not doing everything for my kids

I’m so guilty of fawning over my (fully capable) kids. I get their water. I get their snacks. I put their laundry away in their drawers. Then, I resent how lazy and helpless they act.

This summer? I’m not doing it.

I attended an open house, hosted by my children’s school district, last year. They wanted input about how they can better prepare students for the “real world” after school. It really got me thinking- how many parents are just like me? I’m open to my children learning life skills at school, but what about basics like cooking, hygiene, and cleaning house? Those kinds of lessons can only be taught at home.

We’re in early stages of this experiment, but I’ll let you know how it goes. I’m hopeful my children will be more self-sufficient– and more confident they can do things for themselves!– by summer’s end.

I’m not comparing my kids to other kids

Not that I do this often, but it seems to pop up in summer more than the rest of the year. It never serves me well, so I am not doing it this summer!

Some children (and their families) benefit from a really regimented summer schedule. Some don’t.

Some children are really strong swimmers and are super confident in the pool. Others are just starting to learn.

Some children learn to ride a bicycle easily. Others wait, or don’t care to learn.

Some children are social butterflies and want to see their friends all summer. Some enjoy their solitude.

It’s all OK! Summer should be about freedom. No comparison, no judgment.

I’m not comparing my mom bod to other mom bods

Seriously. Why do I do this? I realize that even if everyone ate the exact same diet and exercised the exact same amount, we would still have different bodies. And yet…

Maybe because we’re wearing less clothing, or in bathing suits, but I always feel extra body-self conscious in summer. I’m banishing thoughts of “My kids are way older than hers and she has ABS?!” this summer. Just say no!

I’m not leaving the house without SPF- on me, or on my children

I know, I know. We all know. But I reach a point mid summer where we are all pretty tan and I’m tired of fighting my kids to get sunscreen on their faces. I make them promise to wear a hat and call it good. I’m not doing that this year, though.

We all know how prevalent skin cancer rates are, especially here in the south. I want my kids to learn that sunscreen on their face is part of their morning routine, and sunscreen on the rest of their body too if it will be exposed. Going without it is a hard pass!

I’m not letting my ‘big kid’ opt out

My first born starts middle school in the fall- and he’s going full tween. He thinks he’s outgrown a lot of the things he used to love- splash pads, playgrounds, even playing in the sand on the beach.

But this summer? He’s getting dragged along. I will force him to have fun if my life depends on it.

Childhood is fleeting, and modern parenting coupled with technology seems to be speeding it up. Let’s slow it down for the summer.

Simple pleasures. Water balloon fights. Popsicles melting before we can finish them. And maybe letting my 11 year old experience just a little bit of nostalgia for his younger days before he turns full teenager on me in couple short years.

I’m not over scheduling

Kids need downtime. And they also need downtime with their parents. Time to just spend doing nothing. Let the boredom kick in, and sometimes the creativity begins.

We want to hang out with friends, go to our neighborhood pool, or maybe just stay in pajamas all day. We’ve got outings planned, and a few camps, but most of the summer involves sweet freedom to do whatever we want.

Life only gets busier the older your kids get. Savor the downtime while you can!

I’m not going to worry about making things ‘perfect’ or ‘magical’

Did I ever tell you about the time I tried to be an Instagram or Pinterest mom? The kind who has it all together and does cute photo worthy crafts or cuts fruit up into little shapes for her kid? Yeah, it’s not me.

And it’s about time I stop apologizing for that.

I’m a hot mess, but I love my kids fiercely and we have so much fun. It may not look perfect from the outside, but on the inside? It feels pretty close. This summer, I’m choosing to focus on that.

What are you NOT doing this summer?