Why I Will Still Send My Child to Overnight Summer Camp

Any time a mass tragedy occurs, it’s always sage advice to stay away from the comment sections on any sort of news article. I try to abide by that for self-preservation but I went down some rabbit holes this past week since the Hill Country flooding. I won’t say it was all bad, but what was bad, was BAD. But the comments that caught my attention the most surrounded sending kids to overnight summer camp.

“I would never send my kid away during the summer. I want them beside me all the time.”

“Why would a parent want to get rid of their kid during summertime?”

“Those babies, homesick, and then get washed away. I would never.”

And they go on and on, and these are the tamer ones. This sort of “I’m better than you are because I would never send my children to overnight camp,” kind of righteousness. At Houston Moms, we do our best to talk about all viewpoints – all moms are not the same, nor do we all operate our households in the similar ways. But in that same vein, then we MUST NOT treat other parents who make decisions different than ours like lepers. I can only imagine one of the Camp Mystic parents reading the comments, and the thoughts that swirled in their brain, already questioning every decision they’ve made. It’s not fair, and it’s not kind, and well, it’s not true for so many families.

My son was obsessed with the show Bunk’d when he was in early elementary school, so as soon as he could sign up for overnight summer camp, he was going. Was he young? YES, only 8 years old. Did I cry dropping him off? For sure. Did I stalk camp apps looking for him in pictures? You bet. Did I squeeze the life out of him when I finally got to pick him up 6 days later? I mean, venture a guess.

As parents, we do the best we can with the information that we have to make an informed decision for OUR family, not yours. I’ve been a parent for 15 years, and if I have learned anything, it’s that I cannot bubblewrap my children. We can offer guardrails to keep them safe both physically and online, but there’s just this thing called life, and no matter what we do, they can be at risk.

Hell, I send my kids to school every single day, not knowing what may greet them during the school days. It may be bullying, it may be a shooting.

I let them ride their bikes all over our neighborhood, even up to the local restaurants and gas stations, knowing that some errant driver could make a mistake that day. But all of these are real-world experiences. The kids are eventually going to leave our house, y’all. They will leave us and go do big things in this world, but they can only do that if they have some real life experiences. Otherwise they will flounder and flop around. We have to give them enough of a leash to have their own life.

For our family, overnight camp specifically has offered a very SAFE way to explore life outside of our walls and their social walls at school. And in no particular order, here are the reasons I will continue to send my son to summer camp:

1. Because he wants to go:

   That’s the number one. For my son, it’s his highlight of the summer. He ran a strong campaign when he was 7 to go, and he hasn’t wavered. To be clear, we don’t let him do everything he wants to do (we aren’t made of money and again, guardrails) but from a risk level, summer camp typically falls low on the totem pole. He LOVES it.

2. Independence:

   My son is a twin brother to a precocious sister. Summer camp isn’t her thing. She’s tried it but communal living isn’t her favorite. But they have been around each other, in each other’s spaces for a good 15 years now, not including my belly. They crave separate experiences from each other. And my son craves separate experiences from us as parents. I try not to hover too much over his daily, but alas, I am a mom. Camp is a time when he can do new things without mom watching over his shoulder at every move or commenting that maybe 4 Dr. Peppers in a day isn’t the best idea. He’s learning to make his own decisions and doing the right thing even when I’m not there. He’s carrying conversations on this own and he’s forging that path himself.

3. Community:

   There are a multitude of different summer camps out there. The one in particular we send our child to is Christian-based, which reflects our family values. But regardless of which one you send your child to, they are broadening their sense of community, providing a more world-view of what lies outside of Katy, Texas. They are meeting kids from all over, and sharing their stories, while listening to theirs.

4. Mentorship:

   I get chills every time I drop my kiddo at camp because I meet the absolute neatest counselors and staff who are truly passionate about the camp experience. Their complete joy is palpable. I always think back to when I was 18, 19, 20 – was I that full of life? I don’t know, but these kids have IT. They are super vetted, trained, and it’s crazy hard to even get a position at the camp we go to. I honestly could not feel more safe for them to be under their guidance. The sweet and encouraging words they speak into the campers will live with our kids forever.

5. Absence and Fonder and All That:

   Listen. I have been a parent for what feels like a long time. I’ve wanted to be a parent for an even longer time. But as sweet as the years are, and I one hundred percent choke up on Facebook memories at time, we alllll need a break from each other. It’s not me wanting to not parent for the week. It’s not my kid escaping me. But there is very much of innate desire to do life outside of each other’s orbits. Guys, that is normal. That’s how it is supposed to be. They need to be able to function without me, and it’s good for them to miss me. And it’s good for me to miss them. And at the same time, it’s good for my husband and I to connect on our own time not dictated by children schedules for a week or two. These are all healthy things. And the reunion? It’s OH SO SWEET.

What happened in the Hill Country is unfathomable. What happened to the sweet Camp Mystic campers keeps me up at night. My heart breaks wide open for all the families who are experiencing the depths of a tragedy that I cannot even allow myself to think about. But I also think that those parents sent their campers in all good faith, for many of the reasons above. And I do believe most will continue to send them. I know many who dropped their children off at camp that Sunday after the fateful flooding. Not because we don’t care about our kids but because we do care about our children – enough to let them go make some lifetime memories this summer. Please don’t shame us for being camp proponents. And I would also urge you to not type anything you wouldn’t say to a grieving parent’s face.

Our prayers continue for the Hill Country, Austin, and Leander areas as they continue to recover from this tragedy. It is very much a marathon and there is much to do. Houston Moms has a list of ways to give if you are so inclined.